The First Letter of Peter- 12

Subtitle: Our Witness before the World- Part 4

1 Peter 3:1-6.  This sermon was preached by Pastor Marty Bonner on Sunday, February 8, 2026.

Today, we will once again visit this area of husband-and-wife relationships.  We dealt with this when we were going through the letter to the Colossians (See Weekly Word October 12, 2025).  There Paul told women to submit to their own husbands.

We talked then about two very different approaches to passages like this: Complementarian and Egalitarian.  Essentially, we are asking what God’s original intention was in the Garden of Eden.  Was God setting up a hierarchal union or a horizontal union of two people?  A picturesque way to think about it is to use the idea of a team.  Is Eve given to Team Adam so that he would have a better chance of winning (“Go, Adam, Go!”).  Or is God asking Adam and Eve to unite in one purpose for the sake of Team Husband and Wife?  If you think the hierarchy is baked into God’s design, then you will be complementarian.  If you think it is a result of the fall, then you will be egalitarian.

Throughout history, women have found themselves in cultures that had a varying degree of respect for them from much to little.  Yet, wives, just like all believers, need to let Jesus be the Lord and focus of their relationships.

We are going to deal with men next week so hang in there, ladies, and hold your peace, men.  Let’s look at our passage.

Wives should submit themselves to their husbands (v. 1-2)

Some translations will say “be submissive,” but I don’t think this is as good as “submit yourself.”  God is asking women to choose something for themselves called submission.  The culture of that day had the husband as the ruler of his home.  Depending upon the husband, a woman could chafe severely under this expectation or be happy to do so because he was a wonderful husband.  We do have some differences between Roman and Jewish culture, but both of them saw the man as the head of the home.

Peter’s emphasis is on the way a wife can be a witness for Jesus.  This is why he follows up this challenge for women with a phrase of purpose, “so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives.”

Not all Christian women had believing husbands.  Peter asks her to submit herself to her husband in order to win him over to Christ.  He speaks of these men as being “disobedient to the word.”  This is talking about the Scriptures, but more specifically, the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  Paul states it this way in Acts 17:30-31.  “Truly, these times of ignorance God overlooked, but now commands all men everywhere to repent, “because He has appointed a day on which He will judge the world in righteousness by the Man whom He has ordained.  He has given assurance of this to all by raising Him from the dead.”

If your husband is a believer, then this whole area will take on a completely different complexion.  This is not an adversarial thing where we are fighting for dominance, but a mutual submission for the sake of modeling the relationship between Christ and the Church.  We should work together to glorify Jesus to a lost world.

However, sometimes that lost person is your spouse.  It is somewhat idyllic to think of laying your desires down in order to save another person, especially your spouse.  However, what if he never believes in Jesus?  Can I do it for God in order to glorify Jesus?  Is He worth it?

Peter speaks of the “behavior” of wives.  This conduct or behavior of submission is like the conduct of Jesus.  Notice that the verse opens with the phrase, “in the same way.”  This is referring to the section right before this passage that describes the example of Jesus laying himself down in order to save us!  Peter had given this as an example to household slaves, but he is now pointing wives back to that same example.  These slaves could be suffering under oppressive masters, just as some of these women could be suffering under oppressive husbands.

This may seem unfair and even evil to some.  However, there is nothing evil in choosing to follow Jesus Christ who sacrificed all that he could be in his mortal life in order to save us (while we were yet sinners even).

Wives need to look to Jesus as an example and as a source of strength particularly in situations where the husband is not reasonable. 

Peter gives two words describing this behavior.  “Chaste” is a word that is similar to holy.  It emphasizes purity.  Her life is not defiled with ulterior motives, ill intentions, and selfishness.  Rather, she is trying to serve God.

He also describes this good behavior as “with respect.”  An unreasonable husband who does not want to believe in Jesus may not be worthy of respect.  However, we can still respect the purpose of God in trying to turn his heart away from sin and towards the Lord Jesus.

Let me just give a caution.  God does not intend for women to be physically abused or even killed.  Peter is not talking about physical abuse.  In those days, there would be very little that a woman could do about physical abuse because the society around marriages gave little power to her.  Two thousand years ago a woman could not divorce a man.  If she was caught having an adulterous affair, he could have her killed.  On the other hand, if she caught him having an adulterous affair, there was little that she could do.  Yes, she could make his life miserable, but then that would make her life even more miserable.

In this unfair situation, God is asking wives to serve His greater purpose in the same way that Jesus did.  Women can only do this by entrusting themselves to the One who judges righteously!  God will make all our sacrifices worth it in the end!

Wives should adorn themselves with virtue (v. 3-4)

In verse three, Peter speaks about how a wife adorns herself.  She needs to adorn herself with virtue more than the external things that an ungodly world uses.  Peter lists three areas that were common for those days.  Though they come across as complete prohibitions, it is clear from other passages (see 1 Timothy 2:9) that this is not a prohibition but a call to modesty and proper focus on your internal spirit. 

Paul in 1 Timothy 2:9 speaks of adorning with “proper clothing, modestly and discreetly…”  The problem of objectifying oneself is often a self-preservation mechanism.  It is the one area in which women have power over men (to some degree).  Yet, this is the world’s answer, not God’s.

It was common for the upper-class women to copy the hairstyles of the nobles, seeking out extremely costly garments with costly jewelry.  Clothing could overtly accentuate sexual features.

This hasn’t changed all that much today.  Definitely the styles have changed, but the dynamics have not.  Sometimes we can be dressing as a means of elevating ourselves above other women in the group or community.  There can be class distinctions that purposefully keep poorer women in their place.  We should avoid outward adornments that focus on making ourselves the envy of others.

Of course, there are times when a woman can be dressing to feel powerful over men who seem to be unable to keep themselves from slobbering over a seductive woman.  The line of what is too sexy for public changes with the times.  However, the art of stepping over that line just enough to excite others but not be looked down upon has been practiced in every age.

Peter calls for wives not to focus on complex hair braids, gold jewelry and dress (expensive/seductive).  Instead, they should let it be the internal imperishable things. 

It has been said that beauty is only skin deep.  However, Peter is calling for wives to be beautiful all the way to the core of their hearts (“the hidden person of the heart”).  No one knows what is exactly in your heart, but our speech and actions demonstrate what is on the inside to some degree,

What is my inner life like?  Am I focused on being like Christ, or am I focused on me?

Peter particularly emphasizes two virtues: gentle (meek) and a quiet spirit.

Gentleness is the sense of strength under control.  It is not about being weak but being controlled. 

A quiet spirit is the idea of a person who is peaceful inside.  This person is not a raging sea of anger, ambition, and strong desires.  It doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t say what you think.  It is talking about the peace that comes from the Holy Spirit dwelling within you and knowing that God is pleased with the way you are choosing to serve Him.

This kind of adornment is imperishable because it never grows old (the beautiful spend a lot of money trying to stay beautiful), and it never goes out of style.  This contrasts with the constant changing of trying to keep up with current fashion trends.  Instead, let Christ in you be your beauty.

The example of holy women in the past (v.5-6)

Peter then reminds wives of the godly women in the Old Testament who “hoped in God,” as opposed to their husbands or the things of life.  Their hopes were not in things, “I must have this or that!”  Their hopes were not in their husbands, “He must be this or that!”  Instead, they were looking to God to be their help in the present and reward in the future.

Peter describes them as doing what he has been saying, submitting to their husbands.  He then turns to Sarah and Abraham as his example.

Did Sarah and Abraham ever have any friction in their marriage?  Yes, they did.  Yet she is being used as an example of submitting herself.    This ought to make it clear to us that submitting oneself does not mean you can never put your foot down.

Peter doesn’t explain what he is thinking about when he says that she “obeyed Abraham.”  However, from the story, we know that she followed him into a foreign land.  She trusted that he was hearing from God.  She pretended to be his sister before Pharaoh.  So, we see that she followed Abraham’s lead even when he was being a blockhead.

Peter refers to her calling him, “lord.”  This is probably a reference to Genesis 18:12. This was actually an internal thought that she had when the man eating with her husband said that she would have a child.  Of course, that man was the LORD, and she was very old and couldn’t have children.  “Sarah laughed to herself, saying, “After I have become old, shall I have pleasure, my lord [Abraham] being old also?”

The point is not about the title, but about how Sarah is even internally respecting her husband.  Lord was a term of respect for a man of Abraham’s standing.

Peter declares that wives who follow the example of Jesus will be like Sarah, doing what is good (virtuous).  Such a woman need not be frightened by any fear on this earth (external or internal) because she is living for the Lord Jesus.

Wives can be a light to their husbands, to other women, and a light to the world around them.  In such a light, Jesus can be seen by those who are blind to truth.  May God strengthen all wives as they seek to serve Him.

Witness 4 audio

The First Letter of Peter- 9

Subtitle: Our Witness before the World- Part 1

1 Peter 2:11-15.  This sermon was preached by Pastor Marty Bonner on Sunday, January 18, 2026.

In some ways, we can continue to see this passage as Peter talking about all the ways that this new spiritual people are to live out their faith.  However, Peter begins to emphasize the way that our life of faith affects the unbelieving world around us.  This is why I have subtitled this part of the series, “Our Witness before the World.”  This major section of Peter’s letter goes from 1 Peter 2:11-4:11.

Let’s look at our passage.

Abstain from fleshly lusts (v. 11-12)

This small section connects back to an earlier command but also serves to transition into this issue of the world around us.  In chapter 1 verse 14, Peter had challenged them not to be conformed to the former lusts that they had in their ignorance, i.e., before they believed in Jesus.  They had been living for themselves like everyone else in their society.  Now, they are following Jesus and learning to be holy as he is holy.

God’s plan to fix humanity’s sin problem is for us to put our faith in Jesus, live a mortal life fighting sin by faith, and then He will finish the work by Resurrecting us with glorified, heavenly bodies.  Of course, the world is feverishly trying to come up with a different plan.  Ultimately, it is taking us down a path of trying to overcome every obstacle of creation in order to perfect ourselves.  At the root of the human problem is the idea that God cannot be trusted.  His creation cannot be trusted.  We must do it for ourselves!  Instead of accepting the grace of God’s help, we choose to try and make “god” ourselves.  This will not end well.  Imagine the hubris of thinking that fallen mortals can make a perfect immortal.

Chapter 1 ended with the metaphor of an imperishable seed.  Humans are like grass, here today and gone tomorrow.  However, the Word of the Lord endures forever.  We have entered into this mortal grass-existence.  However, by faith in Jesus, we can participate in the immortal and imperishable existence of Jesus, the Word of God.

This led to the beginning of chapter two where Peter tells us to lay aside things like malice, deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander.  These are specific lusts.

This brings us back to verse 11.  Lusts are strong, heated desires that have their source in our body.  We cannot let these strong desires rule over us.  Thus, Peter tells us to abstain from them.  In English, the idea of abstaining is often seen in voting.  A person can vote “yea,” or “nay,” or they can refuse to vote, abstain from voting.  This can be out of protest, or it can be out of protecting future opportunities. 

Regardless, the Greek word that it is used to translate literally means to have these lust away from yourself.  It ties in with the idea of taking off the deeds of the flesh and putting on the character of Christ.  In fact, Paul gives quite the list in Galatians 5:19-21.  He tells us that they are obvious.

Notice that Peter urges them to do this.  The New King James Version says “I beg you…”  Peter feels strongly about this.  The word pictures one who calls you to their side in order to exhort you strongly about something.

He also tells them to abstain from fleshly lusts like foreigners and exiles.  This image was used earlier as well.  He is not just using this image of the Jews among them.  He is also speaking to the Gentiles.  You may be in your homeland but to put your faith in Jesus is to choose to be a part of the exiles of Christ.  We become strangers in a land that is familiar to us.

This is one of the classic tests of character.  A person who is in a place where no one knows them can be tempted to do as the Romans (when in Rome…).  This is a common way for a spouse to take their first step of unfaithfulness.

We recognize that all of humanity is in exile from God.  But in Jesus, we become exiles with a promise of a promised land.  God is in the business of bringing people out of exile into His Promised Land.

We can be blind to all the ways that our culture is pulling us away from Christ, so Peter has focused on fleshly lusts.

Peter also describes these fleshly lusts as waging war against our soul.  This is a war of possession.  Your flesh wants control of you.  It will be all about the pursuit of satisfying its urges.  However, Jesus has called us to take a stand against it. He stated in Luke 21:19, “By your perseverance, take possession of your souls.”  If you let your flesh and its strong desires win, then you will find yourself in bondage to it.  The longer this goes on the harder it will be to break this bondage.  Yet, all things are possible with God!

The lusts of our flesh can wear us down.  We can grow weary of denying them and casting them aside.  On top of this, the world around us cajoles us, even badgers us, towards living a life of satisfying our lusts.

This internal battle will have an outward effect, which he turns to next.

“Keep your behavior excellent among the nations.”  The inner battle leads to external behavior, or conduct.  This is seen and even experienced by the world, the nations, in which we live.  This is really the same command with parallel language.

What is excellent behavior?  Peter clearly means excellent by God’s definition and not by the definition of the world around you.  This word excellent has the idea of good as well as a moral good.  It is connected to beauty.  Can we live in a way that is beautiful and morally good to God?  Jesus is the pattern and the help for us to do so.

They are to do this in the face of slander.  Early Christians were slandered a lot, whether ignorantly or maliciously.  Some of the slanders were as follows:

1. Communion was often described as a ritual of eating the flesh and drinking the flesh of babies.
2. Their times of communion involved a meal called the love feast.  It was common to claim that these were nothing more than orgies (gluttony on food and sexual immorality). 
3. Christians were accused of being antisocial because they didn’t participate in the entertainments of the culture.
4. They were also accused of being atheists because they didn’t worship all of the gods.

Such slanders are done because they tend to be effective upon weak people.  It can affect some by causing them to be angry and respond in an unchristian way.  It affects others by stirring fear in their heart.  The fleshly lust of being accepted, approved by others, can lead us away from Christ and into the world.

Christians should not be quick to believe statements about others that we have not personally observed.  Of course, we shouldn’t overly defend people that we do not know either.  Have you noticed that we are a society that is pushed to and fro by slanders and libels galore?  This is a part of the sinful culture in which we live.  Can I continue to abstain from fleshly lusts when others around me deploy them against me?

No matter how the world describes our actions, we are to live out the excellent behavior that Christ leads us to do.  Like the good Samaritan, we do the right thing whether others do or not. 

Again, they may malign us, but here is the main thing.  Peter says that they will observe our good deeds.  Have you ever thought that God gives us sacrificial things to do in order to get the attention of the world and to be a witness to it?  They need to see us doing Christ-like things!  They may be perplexed at why you don’t do what they do, and they may even be angry that you are not like them.  Yet, they will see us doing the righteousness of Christ nonetheless.

Peter then says that they will glorify God in the day of visitation.  This visible evidence of the work of God’s Spirit within us will have an effect one way or another.

The day of visitation mentioned here simply means a day when God shows up, whether for good or bad.  This can be contemplated in the ultimate sense when all the wicked are brought before Jesus for judgment.  How will they glorify God then?  They will recognize in the moment that they were wrong and that we were right.  As they declare that Jesus is Lord, they are also declaring that His work in us was true.

It is also possible to see the day of visitation in regard to the times that the Spirit of God touches a person’s heart and mind.  This visitation of grace begs the question.  What will you do with this Jesus?  When we demonstrate the goodness of Christ to a sinful world, some of them may glorify God by putting their faith in Jesus at a later date.  This is the best revenge upon enemies.  Show them Jesus and give them the opportunity to become a part of the new spiritual people of God, a brother!

Submit to every human institution (v. 13-15)

Peter now focuses particularly upon human authority structures in our lives.  These people were not under the authority of these United States of America.  They were under the Roman Empire and the Roman Emperor, Caesar.  This was a dictatorship with local governors and magistrates serving the purposes of Caesar.

We have talked about this word “submit” in the past.  It refers to taking your proper place under a particular authority.  It does not mean to obey every command.  This is exampled by Peter and the apostles in Acts 5.  They were told by the authorities to stop teaching about Jesus.  Peter stated, “We must obey God rather than men.”  How did they take their proper place under authority?  They did not obey the command that was contrary to God, but they did submit to the arrests and beatings.  They did not use the arrogance of these human authorities as a justification for fighting back with weapons.  In fact, we saw this during the arrest of Jesus.  Jesus had done exactly what God had commanded him to do.  However, he submitted to their arrest.

We are not going to fix the authorities of this world through revolution, swords, and guns.  Christians are not called to be purposefully rebelling against authorities.  However, we are not called to blind obedience to them either.  We are called to be like Christ, to share his Gospel.  We image the good Character of Christ.  What they do with us between them and Christ.

The Roman Empire no longer exists today.  That is the judgment of Jesus Christ!  And, if we are not careful, the judgment of Jesus Christ may cause the United States of America to no longer exist. 

The only thing that can fix the authorities is for enough of this Republic to repent, trust the Word of God in Jesus, and to live out that faith boldly.  In truth, to submit to the human authorities is to submit to the authority of Jesus.

In all of this, we must be led by the Holy Spirit.  Men like Jeremiah were accused of not submitting to the government because they didn’t like what he was saying.  Jeremiah did what he did for the Lord.  This is what Peter means when he says for us to submit “for the Lord’s sake.”  We can be led by God to be a rebuke to authorities all the while staying in proper submission to the authority they have.

We may not feel like doing this, but we do it for Jesus.  Jesus is King over Ceasar, over the POTUS, over any leader of a nation today.  We may ask why God let’s some of them do wicked things.  It is because He gives people time to see the error of their ways, to see His people living righteously in spite of their evil.  Yet, in the end, Jesus does judge these nations.  Do you not realize that most nations today are less than 200 years old?  As these United States of America approach 250 years since our formation, we should do so with great humility and repentance.

Regardless of the level of the authority, we respect the command of Christ.  These authorities are responsible for punishing evildoers and praising those who do right.  They may do a horrible job at this.  They may even have totally corrupted the processes that were set up to ensure this.  Yet, God will have the final word.

We are not under the Roman Empire.  The average American does not understand how authority works in this Republic.  We tend to believe that the citizens have the least authority, then the cities and counties, then the States, and finally, the Federal government is the top authority.  Those who crafted the wording of the Constitution would be perplexed at how ignorant we are in these matters.

If you think of authority as a sphere of operation, then we can recognize that a man and woman would have authority over their home and what happens in it.  This is a sphere in which the State and the federal government had no authority.  These other groups may have more power than you and can abuse that power, but in the end, they have no authority over your home.

They did not see the federal government as above or below the State governments.  Some of the powers invested in the States were delegated to the federal government.  It was a delegated authority.  The federal government is the highest authority only in those enumerated spheres that we stipulate in the Constitution.  Anything outside of that is an abuse of power without proper authority.

In those spheres that were not given to the federal government, the States would be the highest authority, but only if the people of those States had given them that sphere of authority in their State constitutions.

All authority is given by We the People through constitutions to our State and federal servants.  If a particular authority is not stipulated in a constitution, then it is retained by the people.

This brings up the question of sovereignty.  Jesus is the capital S Sovereign of these United States.  However, We the People are the little s sovereign of this land.  We need to always be asking who have We the People made to be the proper authority in this area?  We need to also ask, “What is God’s purpose?”

If we are willing to do anything in order to “fix” the government, then we will find it is easier said than done.  This is a spiritual problem not a political problem.  Many evildoers have pushed themselves into our authority structures.  In those structures, they have arrogated powers to themselves that were never properly given them.  Until We the People repent and call our elected servants to heel, corruption and wickedness will rule over the land.  This will only bring the judgment of Christ against this great Republic.

In the end, Peter states that God wants us to submit to the authorities in order to silence the ignorance of foolish men.  Many of these foolish men are not Christians, but some of them are.  Those who do not accept the truth of the authority of Jesus have a vested interest in maligning His Church.  On top of this, certain parts of the Church have not followed this admonition perfectly in the past.

God is teaching this world about righteousness and freedom.  We can work in harmony with that teaching, or we can be at odds with what God is doing through Jesus.

This is where controlling the fleshly lusts can help us.  Much of politics is about manipulating the fleshly lusts of the populace in order to gain power against an opponent.  We can be manipulated to work against our own best interests!  No politician and no political party can fix this land.  Only a repentant people surrendered to the authority of Jesus can be truly set free from the bondage into which they have fallen.  That will transform our society!

Our Witness 1 audio

Putting on the "New Man" at Home II

Colossians 3:22-4:1.  This sermon was preached by Pastor Marty Bonner on August 5, 2018 and is the 2^nd part of a sermon that was preached on July 22, 2018.  If you haven’t read or listened to it first then please do so.

Today we pick up where we left off several weeks ago.  In summary this section is about believers in Christ taking off the “old man” and putting on the “new man.”  Of course the old man that we put off is our own nature with its thoughts, feelings, and desires.  The New Man that we are putting on is Christ.

When we stopped in part I, we had begun talking about what it means for a slave to “put on the new man.”  This relationship between masters and slaves was very common in those days and could not be overlooked.  Though western societies may be able to say that they don’t have slaves anymore, we must be careful of discounting these words as no longer relevant, or as morally corrupt.  As I said in part I, the western world has simply taken the slave class and added them to the poor class.  Though they are no longer owned as property by another, they still are at the mercy of those around them who have money and jobs in order to make a living.  Thus these words should be seen as speaking to the relationship of the fortunate and the less fortunate, the haves and the have-nots.

Slaves obey your masters

In verse 22, slaves are told to obey their masters.  In fact, they are challenged and commanded to please God by working hard even when the earthly master isn’t looking.  This is to be done out of a sincere heart that fears God.

In case you haven’t spent time thinking about why even the New Testament emphasizes a positive aspect to a fear of the Lord, I will take a few moments to stir your thinking on this.  It is easy to say something that goes like this.  Fear was proper when people were under the Law of Moses.  But now that we are free in Christ we should no longer fear God.  Besides, doesn’t the Bible say that “Perfect love casts out all fear?”  The problem is that this one verse is not all that is spoken in the New Testament about fear.  We cannot ignore all the other verses, like this one here, and others like Philippians 2:12.

“Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling;” (NKJV)

The perfect love of God casts out all the fear in regards to His heart towards us.  When you recognize Jesus is on the cross for your sins, you no longer fear that He doesn’t love you.  You know that He has laid down His life for you.  However, this is not what the phrase “fearing God” means in verse 22.  There it is talking about the restraint we should have when tempted to sin.  Like Joseph when he was being seduced by Potiphar’s wife, we must shudder at the thought of sinning against The One who was willing to die for us.  When we are walking in harmony with God we are secure in His love and need not fear that He will change His mind.  However, when we are tempted by sin, we should shrink back from the hideous thought of betraying our Lord’s sacrifice, not because He will quit loving us, but because I might quit loving Him and become an adulterer at heart.  To summarize, the fear that is cast out is in regard to God’s love.  The fear that should remain is in regard to sin’s ability to pull our heart away from the Lord and destroy us.

In verse 23, Paul adds that they should do everything as if unto the Lord.  This verse is not only about slaves.  First of all, all Christians are slaves of God and thus this applies.  However, even contextually, Paul is just stating for slaves what he already stated for all Christians in verse 17.

“And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus…” (NKJV)

Now in verse 23 Paul has added the word “heartily.”  It means that we don’t just outwardly perform the duty.  Instead we put our whole heart into doing it. 

It is worth noting that the effect of what Paul is doing here is not a means of keeping slaves quiet and away from revolt.  Paul is not working for the master-class to keep the slaves in subjection.  Rather, he has just helped the lowest people of society, whose lives and duties give them no obvious sense of purpose and meaning, to see that there is a holy aspect to the thankless and abject station that they have in life.  Regardless of how the world views you and your place in it, God sees you as His servant and that is a high position indeed.  Such an idea lifts our hearts out of the muck and the mire, washes it off, and says, “You serve the King of the Universe!”  It is only our myopic and snobbish elitism that cannot see how many slaves came to find hope in the Gospel that they never found in revolts.  In Christ the Christian slave could lift up his head and know that His true Master loved him greatly.  This in no way supports slavery, but rather supports the slave who had no hope of getting out of their situation.

Paul goes on to explain why a slave, or employee for that matter, should obey this command.  First, they will receive the reward of the inheritance.  The inheritance that Paul is talking about is the one that all believers will inherit from God the Father.  Though they have no inheritance in this world, Christian slaves know that they stand to inherit from God alongside of every other station and class in this world.  This life is simply a testing ground.  The life to come is our inheritance.  No one can touch it or separate you from it.  Thus the slave could be faithful to God because God is always faithful and will reward our service to Him in temporal things with eternal things.

The second reason a slave should obey in this matter is because God will repay those who do wrong without partiality.  Now, this sword cuts both ways.  On one hand the slave, who remains in anger and hatred, and refuses in this matter will also be repaid with judgment from God.  On the other hand, the main purpose is to encourage the slave who tries to obey their master and yet is wronged by the master.  Many harsh, unrealistic, oppressive masters have existed in this world.  But here a play on the word reward is made.  Those who wrong slaves will be repaid by God Himself.  How does a person keep doing the right thing when others treat them wrongly?  Typically we become frustrated, angry, and vengeful.  We throw off the altruistic purpose and take the path of our flesh.  We reject Christ and embrace Satan.  These destructive works of the flesh then pull us down into the slavery of sin.  However, when I recognize that even those who abuse me will have their day of reckoning before God, then I can focus on my part of the situation and let go of theirs.  God is an impartial judge.  He does not say, “It’s okay that you were overly harsh with your slave even though he tried his best to be faithful to your commands.”  No.  The Lord of Heaven that sends Lazarus to Abraham’s bosom and the rich man into the fire will also pay back those who never seem to have to pay for their sins in this life.  With God, no one is ever “too big” to fail and that should be a shot across the bow for all those in this life who have position over others.  By the way, even if society says it is okay to abuse slaves because they are your property, God will then treat you as you treated your slaves.

Masters treat your slaves justly and fairly

Though chapter three ends at verse 25, verse one of chapter four clearly goes with chapter three.  For those who aren’t aware, no part of the Bible was written with chapter and verse divisions.  These were added later for convenience.  In the 13^th century AD several chapter schemes were created and then later in the 16^th century verse divisions were added.  The point being that we should be aware that the chapter divisions are not always in the proper spot.  Chapter four verse one is the counterpoint to chapter three’s instructions to slaves.

Notice that if Paul was just trying to prop up a hierarchical system, he wouldn’t say what he does to masters.  He would most likely tell them to obey the magistrates and the king.  But instead, Paul tells masters that if they have put on Christ it will affect how they treat their slaves.  This is critical because it is the tendency to treat slaves as subhuman, property, and undeserving of basic human treatment that makes it so odious and loathsome.  It is too easy for those of the higher class of society to look upon those of a lower station as being something less than human.  This dynamic did not cease with the Emancipation Proclamation.  It continues to this day.  The leaders of our governments have come to see certain parts of our citizenry as less of a human as they are.  This is always used to justify tyranny.  In the 1800’s it was common to hear slaves described as less evolved and thus on par with animals.  Throughout all of history slaves had no redress for any “wrongs” against them.  They were simply property.

Yet here masters are warned that God will take note of how they treat their slaves.  Both the slave and the master are equally human and therefore imagers of God.  Psalm 62:9 says, “Those of low estate are but a breath; those of high estate are a delusion; in the balances they go up; they are together lighter than a breath.”  The point is that those of high estate are not of greater substance before God.  If you buy into the idea that they do, or that they will somehow be treated differently then you are deluded.  Many a king, magistrate, judge, lawyer, politician, business owner, etc. will have their eyes opened on that day that they stand before God and give account for treating others as somehow less than human.  All humans should be respected as human beings created by God for His purposes, and created higher than the animals, yet lower than the angels.

The treatment is qualified by the word “justly.”  James 5:4 gives a picture of the lack of justice in those days when it says, “The wages of the laborers who mowed your fields, which you kept back by fraud, cry out; and the cries of the reapers have reached the ears of the Lord of Hosts!”  It is easy for masters, business owners, and their management to have unreasonable expectations for slaves or workers.  When Israel was enslaved in Egypt, Pharaoh gave the unreasonable demand that the Israelites continue to meet their quotas while additionally having to get their own straw (see Exodus 5).  The key here is that historically masters have done what is in accordance with the commands and laws of their country.  Such laws cared little for slaves.  But God does care for them.  Thus the justness of a Christian’s actions toward their fellow man is not determined by what is acceptable in their country.  It is determined by God.  Many people today are spouting and perpetrating injustices in the name of justice.  They believe that the end justifies the means.  All such self-justification will melt when you stand before God.  The question is what does God think is just and righteous?  His word makes it very clear.

The word “fairly” is also used.  This could be seen in relation to other servants, i.e. treat all the slaves equally without partiality.  However, it is more likely meant in relation to how the slave serves the master.  It is only equitable or fair that the master treats the slave kindly when the slave’s life consists of the lowly duty of serving you.  The slave’s task is not easy.  It is only fair that the master not oppressively add to that task out of selfish concerns.  In fact it begs the question, “How harsh of a task master is God to the master?”  It is intended to make the master realize that he will be held accountable for how he treats his slaves.

Verse one ends with the reminder to masters that they have a Master in Heaven.  We are all in subjection to God.  Clearly, He is not like we are.  But He will hold all men responsible for their actions in this life.  The ultimate principle here is to focus on your side of the relationship, and do it in a way that pleases God despite what others do or don’t do.  We are serving Him in this life not self or society.  If we can righteously work for a change in society then that is good.  But the end does not justify the means.  The goal does not justify the path that we take to get there.

This is the new man: a person who is not trapped in the constructs of today, whether hopelessly furthering them or vengefully rebelling against them.  Even if your flesh and heart wants to identify as homosexual, transgender, white nationalist, black power, ad infinitum, we are called to identify as simply a follower of Jesus.  Instead of seeing ourselves as a 99%’er we are called to see ourselves as a follower of Jesus.  Whatever the distinctions that this world tries to put on you, or you want to take upon yourself, today Christ calls you to drop those things and come follow Him.

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Putting on the "New Man" at Home

Colossians 3:18-22.  This sermon was preached by Pastor Marty Bonner on July 22, 2018.

I understand that the imagery used in Colossians three of the “new man” may seem to emphasize gender.  But we should not let our sensitivity to gender issues fog our understanding what Paul is saying here.  The new man is in reality Jesus, and both men and women are to put off their old self and take on a new life that is modeled and led by Christ.  Thus when I use this phrase for how we act at home it is a directive for men, women, and kids of both genders.  We are to all put on Christ live out his directives rather than remaining in our old way of thinking, feeling, and living.

Now, it is important to recognize that the concept of a family or home was instituted by God at the very beginning.  It is he who designed humans with split sexuality that required the union of a man and a woman.  When a man and a woman come together in marriage, they create a unit or a unity before God.  Typically, they will raise up children for the next generation, and in so doing they continue the cycle.  Their children will grow up, find a person of the opposite sex with whom they leave their parents and create a new home together, a new unity before God.  Yes, there are people who identify as homosexual etc. and who reject this.  But this is not the purpose of our time together today.  Here we are listening to what God has to say regarding how each member of the household should approach that unit.

Humanity has often warped this institution of God for its own ends.  In fact, in the fall of Genesis chapter three, God warns Eve that her sin would impact her relationship with her husband, and that effect has echoed throughout each generation.  It is not just humanity that is the problem, but rather humanity in its fallen state or sinful state.  In fact everything that people would point to as bad within marriage and family, can be directly attributed to sinfulness in the hearts of those doing it.  The answer is not to throw aside God’s institution, but rather to become better husbands, wives, parents and children.

In our passage Paul deals with three relationships that were very hierarchical in those days.  They were husband over wife, parents over children, and masters over their house-slaves.

Modern man often judges the Bible and its writers because they did not battle against these hierarchies.  However, they often do this because they do not understand that God calls us to a different battle.  As long as there are humans on this earth, hierarchical relationships will continue to exist.  In tearing down one system, we only find another hierarchy imposed upon us.  The systems of this world use envy and strife as the energy to keep the system moving forward.  As long as everyone is busy trying to destroy the hierarchy or become it, we lose sight of the true battle that will destroy us all; the battle in our hearts and minds.  If we toss aside the system of today and replace it with another system, we will only find another form of tyranny and hierarchy because people have a sin problem.  So instead of stirring up a slave riot, Christianity taught slaves how to break free of the slavery in their hearts and minds, a slavery to sin.  The purpose of this life is to overcome sin’s hold on our heart, regardless of where your place is in the current system.

Wives take your place with your husband

Paul speaks first to the wives in verse 18.  The women of Colosse in the first century were considered to be under their husband’s dominion.  There was a clear hierarchy.  I know that this is heresy in today’s environment.  It sounds like the Bible is supporting the hierarchy and dominance over women.  But that is a corrupt view of the verse and others like it in the Bible.  Instead of focusing on whether the hierarchy is good or not, wives are encouraged to submit to their husbands.  The term “submit” was actually a military term and referred to taking your place within a military hierarchy.  This does not mean a home should be run like a military organization.  Rather, it is a metaphorical usage.  The wife should take her place, whatever that may be (under or alongside) her husband.  I say this because there is more going on here than what this verse implies.

Look back at verse 11 in this chapter.  Paul had just established the reality that the old distinctions of this world are irrelevant in Christ.  “There is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcised nor uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave nor free, but Christ is all and in all.”  He doesn’t mention male-female in that verse.  But the same argument used in Galatians 3:28 does.  The point is that those distinctions that the systems of this world use to place one side over the other are to become meaningless to believers.  Not meaningless in the sense that we pretend they don’t exist, but meaningless in the sense that those distinctions do not drive our thoughts, feelings, and actions.  That is part of the old life.  The new life looks to Christ to lead us in what we should think and what we should do (of course feelings go up and down all the time).  Thus Paul is not saying that the hierarchy is good.  He is simply telling the women that Christ wants them to take their place (whatever it may be) in the home.  In that day it was clearly a place under the leadership of their husbands.  In 21^st century USA it would be to take your place alongside your husband.  Notice this is Christ’s instructions to individual wives, not an instruction to societies or nations on how they should view the wife-husband relationship.  Thus cultures have a variety of expressions of this relationship, though a male-dominated model has been the most predominate.  We should not let our gender, race, economic status, class, or any other distinction drive our life.

Though our society has embraced the reality that the Bible is actually elevating the status of all underprivileged, it makes the mistake by promoting and inflaming those distinctions.  This only divides us further and keeps us from walking in the unity that God is trying to give us.  Instead of fighting their husbands for dominance, wives need to do their best to work with their husbands as a unit.  Our different gifts will allow for a diversity of expressions for how this would play out.  Today, we do not live in a cultural system with rigid, precise roles.  Husbands and wives have to work out together, with the Holy Spirit’s help, to run the household.  Even if your husband isn’t the Christian that he should be, a wife needs to focus on her obligation before God to work for unity in the home.

In each of these relationships you will find that we are told to do what would be the hardest thing for us to do.  Women had been under a dominance of men for millennia.  With the Gospel’s teaching that those distinctions no longer mattered, it would be easy to “throw off the yoke.”  Instead wives are told to take their place under their husband’s leadership.  Today, women are not in the exact same boat.  But, they still have had to deal with the dominance of men in relationships.  Instead of fighting men for dominance, go into the marriage and ask Christ how to bring peace and unity to it, at least for your part.

Before we move to men, I want to comment on the phrase, “as is fitting in the Lord.”  Again, we can interpret this to mean that it is fitting for women to be under men.  But that is a huge assumption.  He is telling women that it would not be fitting for a follower of Christ to try and take over.  The act of taking your place is what is fitting.  Voluntary submission neutralizes the hierarchical system by refusing to play the game of this world system.  Jesus epitomized this virtue in his life.  He submitted to the leaders of Israel and allowed himself to be crucified.  However, in so doing we are told that He overcame the world.  Thus if we are really following Jesus as our model, and He really is leading us, we will reject the rebel approach and adopt the humble servant model.  It is only fitting that Christians, men or women, who find themselves in a similar situation, should focus on honoring Christ rather than getting something for themselves.  Thus what is fitting in the Lord is to use the power and gifts that we have for others at the direction of Jesus, rather than for our own selfish purposes.  In Christ we voluntarily give up power in order to serve others.  Christ is the power.  When we adopt this attitude we neutralize the attempt of the spirit of this world to play us off of one another.

Husbands love your wives without bitterness

Husbands are also given a command, but notice that the command is not to make sure your wife is taking her place.  Instead husbands are told to love their wife, regardless of whether she “submits” or not, without being bitter.  It is easy for a person to become bitter when they don’t think they are getting what they should.  Christ tells husbands to drop that kind of attitude and instead simply love their wives.

In Ephesians 5, Paul gives the same command, but adds to it that husbands are to love their wives in the same way that Christ loved the Church.  Think about how much Jesus loved the Church.  He loved the Church so much that he laid his life down for us.  This is true physically, but also metaphorically.  Instead of using the power system of this world for His own ends, Jesus used his power for the sake of the Church.  So husbands must not use their power of position, physicality, or cultural standing for their own ends.  Rather, whatever the place of a husband in society, it should be used for the sake of the wife, period.  Love her, not love yourself by telling her how to best serve you.

In fact, Paul takes this one step further in Ephesians 5 by saying that the marital relationship is supposed to be a reflection of Christ’s relationship with the Church.  How well is my part of this marital relationship reflecting Christ?  Christ doesn’t verbally abuse the Church, or manhandle the Church.  He isn’t forcing himself upon the Church and overpowering it.  Historically the Church and husbands have muddied the waters of what Christ has called us to do.  But we cannot let the failures of the past direct our actions today.  We must look to Christ and ask Him to teach us how to love. In fact if we insert the concept here about what is fitting in the Lord, we would end up with a statement like this.  It is fitting in the Lord for a husband to use the power and gifts that he has for the sake of his wife at the direction of Jesus, rather than for his own selfish purposes!

Children obey your parents

Children are simply told to obey their parents.  Yes, Jesus expects children to reject the path of their “old man” and put on the “new man.”  Yet, instead of obeying parents because, “I said so,” they are to obey their parents in order to please Jesus.  Some parents cannot be pleased regardless what a kid does.  But kids, take heart.  Your job is not to please your mom and dad, but to do your best to please Jesus.  This can make all the difference and protects our hearts against the poison of rebellion.

It is God’s design that puts children in a loving home of a man and a woman who are working in unity for the good of that child, as directed by Christ.  However, it is our sin that messes up every aspect of that last sentence.  None of us should use the sin of the other people in the family to justify rebellion against the commands of Christ.  This world does its best to stir up kids against the leadership of their parents.  It also demoralizes parents to the point that they either give up trying to train their children, or they buy into the lies of this world system and neglect them.

Let me just say that no kid deserves to be abused by their parents or any guardian for that matter.  It is up to the other adults in their life to be a help when abuse happens.  However, we are headed to the place that to teach your child to serve Christ is labeled as child abuse.  So we need a balance here.  Kids have a need to learn to follow the leadership of their parents before they can take on the leadership of their own life as an adult.

Fathers don’t stir up your children

Though this is addressed to fathers, it would apply to both parents.  In the child-parent relationship, the kid has no power.  Some of that has been moderated with education and CPS, etc.  Here Christ commands fathers not to purposefully stir up their children, or exasperate them.  The word translated here has the idea that you are provoking them to the point that they are angry and wrathful.  Parents should always be monitoring the heart of the child because our job is not to force them into a hierarchical system, but to help them grow up and become like Jesus.

The caution is further defined by the fact that if we go too far, we can discourage the child.  The term translated “discouraged” in verse 21 basically means to break the spirit of the child.  Each child is an image-bearer of God who is destined to take their place in the ranks of God’s people.  In that sense they are your little brother or sister.  Instead of correcting and teaching out of hurt and exercising dominance, we are to correct and teach children out of love and in order to help them become like Christ.  All parents should learn to use their power and gifts, not to spoil a child rotten, but to prepare them for life and help them to become like Jesus, without breaking their spirit and discouraging them away from Him.

Slaves obey your masters

Though I mentioned this earlier, I must reiterate that it is easy to be angry that the Bible doesn’t tell us to throw off slavery and all masters.  However, Christ calls slaves to a different battle.  Over the process of time, Christians were able to see the truth of the Scriptures and come up with a system that removed these social inequities.  However, let us not lose the point of the Scriptures.  What does it profit a slave to be emancipated within society and yet still be in chains to sin on the inside?  Yes, his few years in this world may be happier, possibly.  But, he will be in a world of hurt when he stands before God.

We must recognize that the world’s system always has slaves, whether they are called that or not.  In fact, there is still slavery going on in the USA today.  It has just been swept under the rug and exists in seedy places, where women, children, and men are trafficked in order to satisfy the cravings of wicked people.  We should continue to do our best to remove this blight from our society.  However, that societal battle cannot save a person’s soul.

We should also take note that this passage is not talking about those who are pressed into slavery illegally. 

Slaves are given a hard command just as husbands, wives, and children; obey your masters.  First of all we should notice the qualification that these “masters” are master in regard to the body only.  Men have often bought and sold the bodies of other humans.  But it is up to the slave whether they have also purchased their soul.  A master cannot control your heart and mind unless you let him.  They cannot control your ability to worship God in the holies of holies of your own heart and mind.  Thus slaves can serve their masters as an act of worship to their true master in heaven.  I don’t have time to go into all the ways that the slavery that happened throughout the United States of America, and elsewhere, was actually breaking the commands of Scripture.  But please hear the heart of Paul’s message.  The answer is not in breaking out of the situation, but in first, breaking free from the sins of your own heart.

Secondly, two words are used to challenge how Christian slaves served their masters.  The first word is “eye-service,” and the second is “men-pleasers.”  Eye-service refers to the fact that a worker will tend to be lazy when the boss is not around, and then start working hard when the boss is looking.  This is how the flesh is when we are focused on pleasing people in order to get what we want.  Christians are called to reject being a “man-pleaser.”  Instead we are to please God.

Technically the Bible emancipates all Christian slaves from their masters and tells them to serve their earthly masters as a service to Christ.  Now they are to be the best slave possible, working hard even when they are not being watched.  They are to do a sincere job in the fear of God, not their earthly master.  This may seem to be a heartless command on one hand.  However, how much more heartless is it to encourage people to rebel, and yet leave them in shackles to their own sinful hearts?  Only the Holy Spirit can help us to see the radical call of God to break the hold that the system of this world has on your heart.  Even in choosing the path of the rebel, you are only satisfying the systems need to energize for the next developing system.  Meanwhile people go on not dealing with their own hearts.

In our society we have technically taken the slave class and moved it into the poor class.  Today we are tempted in our jobs to be pit against our employers.  Yes, many employers of this world are taking advantage of their employees.  But, as a Christian it is not my job to rebel against the employers of this world.  Rather, it is my job to give an honest day’s work out of respect for Christ.  The rest is between Christ and my employer.  Christians should be the best employees that the world can hire because we have learned to use our power and gifts for the sake of others, regardless of what we get from them in return.

Let me close this by challenging us today.  Don’t let the world dictate what you believe and what you will do.  Instead serve Christ with your life.  Let Him teach you how to quit this system of pitting one group against another.  Let Him teach you how to use your power and gifts to bless others in your life, starting at home, and working outward from there.  Let Christ teach you how to root out those hurts and that bitterness, which keeps you circling the same drain over and over again.  Let His Holy Spirit lift you up out of the bondage to which this world seeks to chain you.

New Man at Home